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The year in review: Best Dr Mumbos

Mumbrella Asia presents the best Dr Mumbos of 2014.

Heavy fucking speed users. If one of Malaysia’s most powerful telcos wanted more bang for its buck than a standard print ad, it certainly got more than it paid for with the words to promote its high-speed internet service: “If buffering is not an option, then you’ll want this. Recommended for heavy fucking speed Internet users.” Though the wording was tucked in the bottom righthand corner of the ad, and it emerged that the ad didn’t appear in an national newspaper, rather as a leaflet produced by a reseller, Dr Mumbo is of the view that Maxis probably needs to keep a closer eye on its copywriters.

Maxis print ad

 

Riaz: too cute

Riaz: too cute

Winning Indonesia’s talent war with good-looks. A media agency boss complained that a rival agency held unfair sway over the limited talent pool of Southeast Asia’s largest media market because its boss was unreasonably good-looking. That man was Yasir Riaz, who left Singapore for Jakarta to run Starcom Indonesia in October 2013. The rival agency boss, who was trying to recruit people following an account win, told Mumbrella: “There has been a significant challenge to recruit because a particular agency – in this case Starcom – is headed by an individual who does excellently in the looks department.” Wishing the remain unnamed, the agency head, said that while agency staff appreciate character in their leaders, they “want to see eye candy in the office” too.

 

Client excuses for not paying on time. The week after pitch doctor Darren Woolley listed eight ways to spot a dodgy client in a comment piece on Mumbrella, content agency Click2View came up with nine excuses clients give for paying late. They included: “We will check and get back to you”, “One of our directors is not in town to sign the cheque”, “We have forwarded to our Finance team”, “My finance team colleague is on MC this week”, “I cannot find the original invoice. Can you resend please?”, “There were some delays in setting you up as our vendor, we will let you know once it is done”, “Our bank account is closed. We need 2 weeks to reopen another bank account”,“Our bank account is closed. We need 2 weeks to reopen another bank account” and “I forgot the cheque, but I brought beer!”. Dr Mumbo’s favourite? “The bank dongle is not working properly”

 

Nothing is possible at Saatchi & Saatchi Indonesia. The photo of the new ECD of Saatchi & Saatchi’s Jakarta office, Alex Tagaroulias, announced in September, probably could have been better art directed.

Nothing is possible at Saatchi & Saatchi

I want Germany to winAn agency that you would bet on. So, Singapore’s National Council on Problem Gambling, the government-backed charity that was much tittered-at just before the World Cup for its ‘I want Germany to win’ anti-gambling ad (which went spectacularly viral for suggesting that having a flutter is probably a good idea) was appointing a new ad agency. And you probably couldn’t have bet on a better name: Addiction Advertising. The agency apparently itself didn’t see the irony in its own name, announcing on its Facebook page the win with the words: “We are delighted to welcome our latest addict – National Council on Problem Gambling.” Definitely worth a flutter to celebrate.

 

Shareholders queue for lunch

Shareholders queue for lunch

A publisher that marches on its stomach. Near the end of Singapore Press Holdings’ AGM led by company chairman Lee Boon Yang, an elderly lady at the back of the room raised a question deemed more pressing than how, say, the publisher of the Straits Times can reverse a worrying trend of ad and circulation revenue decline. The question was over how food would be served up for shareholders after the AGM this year. In previous years, the prescribed buffet option had caused long queues, which – a shareholder told Dr Mumbo – had probably prompted shareholders to hurry through voting on company policy without thinking about the consequences, because they wanted to be first out the door and in line for the food waiting for them outside. Which raises the question, how much of SPH policy has been decided by shareholders’ rumbling bellies over the years?

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